两位作者可以同意事实,却强调不同的东西。**强调(emphasis)**指作者放在前面、重复、或描写得最细致的内容。比较强调,就是解释这会如何改变读者注意到的东西。
这一课建立在区分论点与其支持之上。这里要看的是每位作者选择把哪些部分推到前面。
强调有哪些迹象?
四个特征可以显示作者强调什么:
- 位置: 文章开头或结尾放了什么。
- 篇幅: 某一点用了多少句子。
- 细节: 哪些点有具体数字或生动描写。
- 措辞: 某一点用正面、负面还是中性的词来表述。
放在前面、描写详细的点是被强调的。被压进一个从句里的点则是被淡化的。
比较强调的步骤
- 确认共同议题。 两篇文章必须谈同一件事或同一个决定。
- 按出现顺序列出每篇文章的要点。
- 标出篇幅和细节最多的点。
- 把两份清单并排放进表格。
- 写一句比较句,指出差别,以及它对读者看法的影响。
例题
议题是一个小岛上减少渡轮班次。两段短文都是原创。
Text A (a council notice): “From March, the ferry will run four times a day instead of six. The change saves the council RM90,000 a year, and each remaining crossing will be fuller and more efficient. Passengers are advised to plan journeys in advance.”
Text B (a resident’s letter): “From March, islanders lose two crossings a day. My neighbour, who dialyses in the mainland hospital three mornings a week, will now have to stay overnight. Saving RM90,000 is not worth that.”
| Text A | Text B | |
|---|---|---|
| 开头 | 时间表的改动 | 岛民的损失 |
| 细节最多的部分 | 节省开支与效率 | 一位邻居的医疗需要 |
| 措辞语气 | 中性、管理式(“advised”、“efficient”) | 个人化、带情绪(“lose”、“overnight”) |
| RM90,000 被当作 | 好处 | 不足以抵消伤害的代价 |
答案: “Both texts accept that the ferry will run less often and mention the saving of RM90,000. However, the council notice stresses efficiency, presenting the cut as a sensible saving with the neutral phrase ‘fuller and more efficient’, whereas the resident stresses the human cost, giving the most space to a neighbour’s hospital visits. As a result, the same figure reads as a benefit in Text A and as a poor trade in Text B.”
请注意,这个答案用了 “whereas” 来连接,并说明了对读者的影响,而不是只列清单。
要留意的错误
常见的失误是分别描述每篇文章,把比较留给读者去做。
错误答案: “Text A talks about savings. Text B talks about a neighbour who needs dialysis.”
这是两段摘要。它没有说明两篇文章在强调上有何不同,也没有说这种差别起了什么作用。
改正方法是用 “whereas” 或 “by contrast” 这样的连接词,然后说明效果:每个选择让读者感受到或优先考虑什么。
自我检测
请看两段关于新单车道的原创短文。
Text C: “The new cycle lane on Jalan Damai cost RM400,000 and is already used by about two hundred riders a day. Journey times for cyclists have dropped by a third.”
Text D: “The cycle lane on Jalan Damai has taken away a whole lane of traffic. Drivers now queue for twenty minutes at peak hour, and shop owners say customers cannot park.”
1. Text C 强调什么,又把什么留在背景里?
Show answer
它强调对骑单车者的好处:使用人数和缩短的行程时间。它把对司机和商店的影响留在背景里,完全没有提到。
2. 写一句关于强调的比较句。
Show answer
“Text C stresses the gains for cyclists through figures on use and journey time, whereas Text D stresses the costs to drivers and shops, so the same lane appears as a success in one text and a problem in the other.”
3. 为什么 “Text C likes the lane and Text D does not” 是个薄弱的答案?
Show answer
它只说出整体意见。没有指出每篇文章把哪些点推到前面,也没有指出显示强调的措辞和细节,所以缺少证据和解释。
接下来学什么
下一项技能是留意那些会改变论述强度的小词。请继续学习留意改变论述的限定语。写作修改对照视图可以帮你把自己的两份比较草稿并排对照。
如果你的比较读起来仍像两段各自独立的摘要,可以在线上一对一 First Language English 补习中,让老师听你说出推理过程,再一起把它写成一句比较。